Looking around, I find I do not belong where I stand. I am placed where I become surrounded by fear and anxiety, where I am forced to walk down an overwhelming path and no matter where I find myself, I am displaced as if the story I have tried to write myself has fallen between my fingers and lit up in flames.
From cheerleading to honors classes, I have fought my whole life to be smart but to also blend in and be like everyone else. I find myself in fear of trying new things, but being scared of being different and trying to surround myself with others because of feeling displaced.
When I started middle school, I tried everything. I was a cheerleader, I was in the National Junior Honors Society, and UIL. I was always involved everywhere. I tried so hard to be like everyone else and have as many friends as possible. I was trying to find my own path into society, but no matter how hard I tried, I was always an outcast; no one understood me and who I was on the inside. So, I spent my entire three years of middle school helping others and just trying my best to get by. Then, I stepped into high school.
I am now a sophomore in high school and even though I have struggled with who I want to become and who I am, I have fought hard and come a long way. My freshman year, I was scared that it had already been so long of a battle, and it gave me so much fear always thinking about how people will see me, if I will be good enough for my teachers, and if anyone would even like me; but now that I have been here in high school a while, I finally know who I am and what I want my future to look like.
Although I still have my difficulties, I have truly found myself through surrounding myself with things I enjoy and with people that share my interest. Since I joined my high school newspaper the people I have met are the sweetest people you could ever meet and have helped me feel like I truly have a place here. Still, I am growing more every day and have learned so much. I still do not blend in with everyone else, but I have slowly found my place in society and I have learned it is better to be different and displaced even if everyone is judging you then to blend and let others pull you down, and I have had to learn how important it is to let go and move forward and not to let others be why I am put down.
The truth is my story is written with my own hands, and I must choose my own path. I shall choose if I fall or if I stand as the opportunities lay in the palms of my hands. I cannot give my opportunities to someone else because my life is not based on others victories and downfalls as it is up to mine instead. So really, I have learned that you do not always have to follow everyone else because everyone’s path is different, and you need to take the time to find your own even if it is difficult.
